Brett Heinkel
Brett Heinkel is considered by most to be the pinnical of civilization. He is known for his looks, and dashing personality. Sit back and enjoy the ride as we travel through history to find out just who Brett Heinkel was. We will discuss his early life, his astranged marriage, his fall and rise through homosexuality and his fame as a pornstar at famed production company LongJohn Productions. Early Life Helmut Heinkel was born in the quiet German village of Schrobenhausen to Josef Heinkel and Mary Dallas Heinkel on June 9th, 1993. He was the oldest of 5, and easily the second most handsome and talented falling behind younger brother Mini Brett. His other siblings were Jürgen (Born 1994), Petra (Born 1994), Sebastian and Katja (Twins, born 1996), and Torsten (Born 2006). Helmut, pleased with his looks, moved out of the Heinkel household at the age of 11, because he knew that his looks could get him by. He found out a year later that his parents left all of his siblings at a Steak 'n Shake on their yearly visit to Montana, United States. This did not phase Helmut at all, as he was living in a mansion as a sugar daddy to then actress and woman, Monica Wanniger. Changing Names and the Clone Helmut began recieving criticism for his name, as Helmut as not the name of someone who would one day earn his throne in Mount Olympos. This disturbed Helmut, as he knew of his destiny, which was to take over Mount Olympos and make Zeus his "bitch", so he went to the Federal Bureau of Names in Bielefeld Gadderbaum, Germany to officially have his name changed. Making his way through wave after wave after wave of paparazzi, Helmut made his way to the front desk, and was given a pamphlet of suggested beautiful people names. One caught his eye, and that was Maximilian. Going against the will of his advisors, he picked a significantly less homo name, which was Brett. Being bored with being so beautiful, Brett Heinkel set off on a mission of peace, to stake his claim in contributions to society. He contacted the top scientist in the world, Zach Curley, and had him build a clone of Brett. Zach Curley jumped at the chance to work on a clone for Brett, and he obliged instantly, in an attempt to gain sexual favors from Brett. The one thing that came from this mission was not Zach Curley, but a perfect clone of Brett Heinkel. But the clone had one fatal flaw. It was not Brett. This flaw led to the clone being named Brendan, and the world came its pants for a second time, despite 4 out of 5 dentists saying that it could not happen. Brett Heinkel and his clone, Brendan Heinkel, had become staples in the world's recent surgeries, and they had staked their plot of land in Farmeville. Porn Career Upon moving to America Heinkel met a young blonde woman by the name of Maddie Golihur at a crazy orgy party. The two immediatly hit it off, and despite being surrounded by many other naked people, only had sex with each other for the rest of the night. After only three weeks of getting to know each other combined with crazy sexual intercourse, Golihur and Heinkel flew to Las Vegas to be married. The couple was joined by Golihur's close friend Monnica Wanniger and Heinkel's best man Matt Wentzel. Though the mariage could not seem to hold together. The couple soon ran out of new ideas in bed, leading Heinkel to at one point try a strawberry-Houdini (and we all know how that goes). The newly-weds asked Wanninger to join in and "spice" up their love life. But after a while Brett became very fond of Wanniger and her looks. He decided to leave Golihur and their failing marriage for Wanniger, leaving behind only a note and $2,546.12 in cash. The couple got married in a quiet ceremony in Canada where a drunk homeless man served as the witness, not LeBron James, who has been know to witness ,many things (but not more time in Cleveland). Following three years of marriage to Wanniger in which the couple had crazy sex at least once a day, Heinkel noticed he was not happy. Despite the awe and beauty of his wife he broke of the marriage. The dirty whore took every penny Heinkel had an ran to be with star football player Tyrone Clark. Without anything to pay for his living expenses he turned to the only thing he had left, his 12.35 inch penis. Heinkel revalutionized the porn world. Offering a large dick to the ladies and taking one from the men.